Yesterday I asked a group of motivated
entrepreneurs, what is the voice in your
head telling you about why you shouldn't
move forward right now?
And the chat just filled up and their
answers broke my heart because these
aren't excuses, these are real beliefs
that real people carry every single day.
So today we're not talking about tactics,
we're talking about the
thing underneath all of it.
The
been amazing.
The energy has been off the charts, the
people on the lives are
incredible, highly engaged.
And we were talking about confidence and
the importance of confidence.
I asked, what is the voice in your head
telling you about why you
shouldn't move forward right now?
And people started sharing in the chat
and the chat just literally blew up.
I'm too young, I'm too old, my audience
isn't big enough, who
am I to talk on this?
Nobody's gonna buy from me, others have
way more experience.
I don't have time for this.
You are not different than anyone else.
Like all of these crazy voices that
people are listening to.
These are the voices in our head that
tell us all the reasons why we shouldn't
move forward, all the
reasons why we can't do something.
And these aren't outliers.
Every single one of these people has
something real to offer, but it's these
gremlins that are
convincing them to stay quiet.
And I know these voices,
because I've heard them myself.
And here's what I've learned over the 22
years of being in business online.
You cannot out market a belief that says
you're not worthy of success.
So let's talk about how you protect your
confidence, because
without it, nothing else works.
In our masterminds, one of the things
that I talk about a lot is the importance
of you and I protecting our
confidence as entrepreneurs.
Because truthfully, if we lose our
confidence, then we are
going to lose our chutzpah.
We're gonna lose our motivation.
We're gonna lose our willingness to try
and experiment, our willingness to put
ourselves out there, our willingness to
market our products and talk about what
it is that we're offering.
And so we've got to find
ways to protect our confidence.
And I've found that there are three solid
ways that are virtually guaranteed to
help give you a boost.
Number one is borrow
belief from a mentor.
See, when your belief runs
low, borrow someone else's.
Confidence, it's
literally like a fuel tank.
And think of your
mentor as a gas station.
So I've had many mentors over my career.
And there are people that at the right
time and gave me the right
fuel to get me back on track.
One of my earliest memories of this was
actually with my parents.
Yes, I consider both of my parents
tremendously influential mentors.
And there was a moment when I remember I
had a path in my mind that I was going to
play professional soccer.
And I had gone, I was 16 years old and I
went and played for this out of town team
that was like really
highly ranked in Ontario.
And it meant that I had to like go and
travel quite a bit just
to even get to practice.
It was like over an hour
just to drive to practice.
But I made this team
and it was incredible.
And we toured all throughout Ontario.
We went and competed in these big
tournaments in the States.
Like it was awesome.
The playing level was at
like a whole nother degree.
It was exact path that I needed to be on
to eventually want to eventually play at
university and maybe,
maybe be able to play pro.
Well, anyway, I played
for this team for a year.
And then the next year, we all had to try
out again and I got cut
and it was devastating.
And worst of all was that I was told from
one of the other coaches that the reason
I got cut wasn't because of my play.
It was because there was another player
in the same position whose dad was
contributing a
significant amount to the team.
And so I got cut for political reasons.
Now, right or wrong, doesn't matter.
I was devastated.
And in fact, I wanted to
give up on soccer altogether.
And I remember in this moment, like my
parents were incredible with me.
And my dad, he said,
"Look, just let it settle."
So like, I was wanting to
give up on soccer completely.
And truthfully, this was the summer that
I was then going to university.
So this would have been the summer that I
was gearing up to then go try
out for the university team.
And here I am, like my
confidence is at an all time low.
I don't even want to
play the sport anymore.
And my dad just let it
settle for a few days.
And then he came back and he suggested
that I play for a
men's team in the summer.
And I was like, "I don't know, dad."
He's like, "Son," he's
like, "Just go and play.
Just go just to have fun,
just to kick a ball around."
What he knew then that I later learned
was a really important lesson.
Sometimes you just got to
get momentum on your side.
And I did, I went and played in this
men's league and I started to pick my
confidence back up and I started scoring
goals again and feeling
good about the whole thing.
And slowly but surely I
started to build momentum.
Was I playing at the level that I would
have been if I had played with this team
that I tried out for?
No, like they were
playing at a way higher level.
But nonetheless, it
still built up my confidence.
So much so that when I did go to
university, I did go and try
out for the team as a walk-on.
And it was crazy.
There was over 300 plus players trying
out for essentially about five spots
because between the returning players and
the recruited players, they had maybe
five spots for these 300
people to be able to make.
And it was intense.
And I remember that that whole process, I
just kept taking it day by day.
That's what my dad kept
telling me, just take it day by day.
And eventually I made the team.
And that team, we went on to win two
national championships.
Now I share all this because that was a
moment when I had to borrow
the belief of my dad or my mom.
Like those were incredible.
And similarly, later on in
my career, it's been the same.
I remember one of my early mentors, John,
he really encouraged me to get out front
on stage and speak and even make an offer
from stage when I was
scared out of my mind.
But he held space for me to do that.
Another time was Reed Tracy, who's the
CEO of Hay House Publishers.
He's been an absolutely
incredible mentor to me.
And there was a moment on August 29th of
2015 that I will never forget.
I actually celebrate that day.
It's called Reed Day because he sent me
an email that forever changed the
trajectory of my life.
I don't even know that you and I would be
talking right now had it
not been for that email.
And I share this because in that moment,
I borrowed the belief
of each of those people.
And see, when you borrow the belief, it
gives you the encouragement to keep
moving, to take that next
right step and to build momentum.
And when you build
momentum, confidence grows.
And when confidence
grows, sales will follow.
See, you don't have to
believe fully in yourself yet.
You just have to borrow enough belief to
take the next right step.
And when your confidence is shaken, you
start to second guess, you experiment
less, you try less, you reach
out less, you end up hiding.
And that's the domino effect of
unprotected confidence.
And there's actually a study on this.
There was a study tracking 5,000
entrepreneurs for five years.
And they found higher self confidence,
boosted venture success odds by 27%,
even after controlling for
funding and prior experience.
Belief isn't soft, my
friend, it is statistical.
So you've got to protect your confidence.
And the first way that I
recommend that is with a mentor.
The second way is to surround yourself
with people who get it.
See, a mastermind as an entrepreneur
isn't a luxury, it's a necessity, because
seeing is believing.
When you're close to people doing the
thing, it rewires
what you see is possible.
So back in 2004, I was just
starting my online business.
And I remember there was an opportunity
to join a mastermind.
And I was really wanted to join it, but
it was really expensive.
So I got to give you context.
The cost of the
mastermind was $15,000 US.
I was making at the time in my speaking
career about $45,000 a year Canadian.
So that $15,000 US,
that's a third straight up.
But when you factor in the exchange rate,
it's even closer to about a half of my
annual speaking salary.
And I remember I called my then
girlfriend, now wife, Amy, and I said to
her, I said, do you
think I should do this?
And she's like, well,
let me ask you a question.
She said, do you think being around these
people will help you grow?
And I said, yeah, I 100% believe that.
And she said, then you got to go for it.
See, she believed in me in that moment,
but that group changed my thinking.
See, a great
mastermind does three things.
It facilitates growth, it supports you in
the hard moments, and it celebrates you
in the amazing ones.
And everyone learns from
each other all along the way.
And Forbes did a study on solopreneurs,
and they found founders who engaged
weekly with a peer support group doubled
their revenue growth
compared to those working alone.
See, you're not meant
to do this in isolation.
Like just think about that.
That Forbes study, solopreneurs doubled
their growth when they
were around a peer group.
See, a mastermind is like a mirror that
doesn't just show you
who you are right now.
It shows you who you're capable of
becoming because you can see it happening
in the person standing next to you.
I was talking to a woman last week when I
was speaking in Dallas.
Her name was Molly.
She's an awesome, awesome human being and
has an incredible topic
where she teaches storytelling.
And she's created this
amazing membership site.
And she, during lunch, asked me like,
"Hey, Stu, what are your thoughts on
memberships right now?"
And I was just telling her, I'm like,
"I'm really pumped and excited about
memberships because they're going through
this transformation and those that get it
right are thriving."
So she's like, "Well,
tell me about that."
So I started telling her and sharing
examples and stories and so forth.
And she just like was just taking it all
in and was almost in awe.
And I said to her, I'm like, "Have you
been around other
membership site owners?"
And she's like, "No, like I've just been
doing this by myself."
And I said to her, I'm like, "Molly, like
I can't tell you enough how important it
is for you to get around other membership
site owners who are in the mix, who have
got their sleeves rolled up, who are
doing the thing that you are doing."
Because inevitably you're gonna tap into
that collective wisdom.
And doing so, it's gonna inspire you.
You're gonna see what's possible.
See, when you're working in isolation,
you're only working from what you know.
But when you get into a mastermind, your
whole worldview expands
and you start to see what's possible
because you're seeing it with your own
eyes with what other people are doing.
Is this making sense?
So you've got to get around people who
are doing the thing that you want to do.
You gotta surround
yourself with people who get it.
Okay, point number three.
You gotta build a system
that captures your wins.
Because I'll tell you this, in those
moments when you are doubting yourself,
one of the most powerful things that you
can do is to revisit your past wins.
And I'm telling you this from experience,
you will forget your wins, I promise you.
Because the gremlins keep running a log
of everything that went wrong and you
need your own log of
everything that went right.
So here's how we do it.
We have two Slack
channels in our company.
One is for the wins for our
courses and our masterminds.
And number two is for the wins of our
customers using our software.
So one, our customer wins
from our course and mastermind.
The other, our customer
wins from our software.
And when confidence dips, all I gotta do
is just open those channels and scroll.
And it's just a powerful reminder that
what we do works, that
what we do is changing lives.
So a couple episodes ago, in episode 245,
I shared a simple email
that we sent to past customers.
And we just asked them, "Hey, what's up?"
Now I encourage you to go back and listen
to that episode if you missed it.
But that whole idea created this flood of
messages from our past clients.
And we were just asking
them, "Hey, what's up?
"How's things going?"
And we heard back from so many people.
We heard back from people that we didn't
even know were customers.
We heard back from people that had done
launches and grown these
incredible memberships.
Lives transformed.
It was a beautiful
reminder that our work matters.
In their book, "The
Gap and the Gain," Dr.
Ben Hardy and Dan Sullivan talk about how
important it is for us to stop measuring
the gap between where you
are and where you want to be.
Instead, measure the
gain of how far you've come.
See, when you see the gains, it becomes
really hard for the gremlins to convince
you that you've got nothing to offer.
And there's research that backs this.
There's research on self-efficacy shows
that it's a belief
built through evidence.
And when entrepreneurs consistently see
that their actions create results, it
compounds into stronger performance and
higher business survival rates.
Your wins channel is
absolutely evidence of that.
And you gotta treat it that way.
So my encouragement to you is when your
customers are sharing wins in your
community, or they send them in via
email, or you hear about them in any way,
capture them, write them down, put them
in a Slack channel or someplace where you
can revisit it again.
Because in those moments when you're
feeling down, this is the wind that will
get those sales pumping again.
Because when you start to see those wins,
you're reminded that these are real
people that you've had an impact on.
These are real people
that you are helping.
These are real people whose lives have
been impacted because of your work.
And that begins to build confidence.
So number one, find a mentor
who can loan you their belief.
Get around people who are growing and
thinking big and build a
system that captures your wins.
This week, I wanna encourage
you to start your wins channel.
Maybe it's a Slack channel, maybe it's a
Google Doc or a note on your phone.
Doesn't matter.
Just start capturing those wins.
one win a week.
Do it for 90 days and come back and tell
me what happened to your confidence.
I guarantee that that
confidence is gonna go up.
Now, speaking of confidence, you know
what else helps build your confidence?
Is when someone leaves a review talking
about how impactful your work is.
So would you be open
to go and doing that?
Would you be open to
going to leave a review?
Because those reviews, they impact things
in a big way because it helps get the
show out to more and more people.
And I wanna hear from you.
Like, what are you enjoying about this
show so I can do more of it?
As we look to wrap up,
I just wanna say this.
The gremlins in your head are real.
Those voices, 100% are
there, but they are liars.
And every single one of those
voices has a counter argument.
You don't have to
believe in yourself 100% today.
You can borrow belief from a mentor.
You can get around people
who show you what's possible.
And you can build a system that reminds
you, even on those hard days, that what
you do works and what you do matters.
Is the inner critic ever going to
completely go quiet?
Probably not.
But here's the thing.
You don't have to silence the gremlins.
You just have to learn to take the next
right step in spite of them.
And the best case scenario if your
business is still out there.
So don't let a voice in your head be the
reason you never find
out what it looks like.
Thanks for listening, my friend.
Don't forget to join us next time.
And remember, the more money you make,
the more impact you can have.
Hey my friend, one of the reasons that I
absolutely love this podcast is I love
talking to people about
what's working right now.
Especially in today's day and age when
things are changing so fast and what used
to work from a promotion no longer works
anywhere near as effective.
I wanna know what is working right now.
So what I did was I organized an
incredible summit and we've got 20 plus
of the top online entrepreneurs who are
breaking down exactly what they're doing.
People like Amy Porterfield, Russell
Brunson, Jeff Walker and then there are
names that you probably won't recognize
whatsoever and it's because they're
dominating their tiny niches but they're
adding thousands and thousands of members
and customers from single promotions.
Come join us,