You're listening to the Play Therapy Podcast with Dr. Brenna Hicks.
Your source for centered and focused play therapy coaching.
Hi, I'm Dr. Brenna Hicks, The Kid Counselor.
This is the Play Therapy Podcast where you get
a master class in child-centered play therapy
and practical support and application for your
work with children and their families.
In today's episode. I know I promised last time that I was moving on to filial,
but I'm actually going to do one more parenting podcast.
Sorry for not telling the truth, but I have a reason.
So I've been doing a lot of discovery calls for
people interested in the Play Therapy Professional™ Certification program.
And I'm hearing the same thing over and over and over again when I'm asking
about what they feel
they would like the most training in the most help with
where they feel their skills are lacking. What I'm consistently hearing
across the board is being able to communicate with parents
and what the
system looks like to do. So,
and I know that we've spent a month and a half or so on talking with parents.
So I'm hopeful that that has given you all
some indication of what that looks like. But
I want to hit home another point that I don't think,
I think I might have mentioned it a few times, but
I'd like to dive in a little bit deeper
because I think when we talk about parents and
making sure that they are engaged
that they have buy in
that they truly understand the process.
They are willing to be patient with the process.
They can handle an uptick in behaviors or regression
or things getting worse before they get better.
There's all of these considerations for the why behind
sharing with parents.
But I think we have to have the right mindset and this is where I think I've
missed the opportunity to really drive this point home. So
one more bear with me. I promise we're moving on to filial next. But I want to
make sense of this a little bit. I think this will be really helpful.
And my disclaimer is that
I run a private pay, private practice
and I know that a lot of the people in my six figure play therapy coaching program,
a lot of people that I'm speaking with about the Play Therapy Professional™
certification,
many of those individuals and probably many of you as listeners
are not necessarily
private pay and you're not necessarily private practice.
So there are lots of you working in schools,
there are lots of you working in agencies and organizations,
there are lots of you working in private practice that accepts insurance.
So I do want to make it clear,
my entire system is based on a private pay, private practice model
and with
the involvement of insurance and with working in a school,
the dynamic is inevitably different.
So I do want to acknowledge that and it's not to say that
the process of scheduling consultations and communicating
and the value of those things.
It's not to say that changes
when it's not private pay, private practice.
But one of the things that we're able to do is offer it for free
and that becomes part of the perceived value that they get.
And in other environments, I know that that's not necessarily the case
and or without them having monetary investment in the process,
sometimes they're not emotionally and mentally involved in the process.
Either so often school counselors complain that they can't get
parents to meet with them no matter what they do
because their child is seen for free and it's when they're at
school and they really don't care to know what's going on.
They just are happy to let the child receive play therapy.
So those are some of just things I wanted to throw out.
I do realize that the environment and the pay structure
influences having those parent consultations, et cetera.
But
moving forward with the idea that best practice
is having an initial parent consultation
to
start the process before you even meet with the child for the first time.
And then every five sessions with the child scheduling a parent meeting,
knowing that those are best practice standards in the child-centered
model.
I want to share a mindset thought with you.
This is something that I find actually very interesting,
Eric and I kind of had a little revelation a while back about this
and it has transformed the way we talk
about this and communicate with clinicians about this.
Here's the idea
we work with kids
who are our clients
and I know that I've mentioned this before.
We're in a very unique situation where we're not working
with the person who pays us as a client.
So that creates a very unique dynamic,
little bit of a barrier and obstacle to overcome
because we pour all of our time and energy into our relationship with the child,
but that's not the customer. So here's where this unfolds
our client is the child, but our customer is the child's parent.
So when we talk about customer service,
when we talk about an excellent customer service experience,
when we talk about having a customer service mindset,
we talk about pleasing our customers
over delivering to our customers. Exceeding expectation, ex
my gosh, exceeding expectations of our customers.
What does that mean?
That's all geared to the parent?
So when we understand
that
the client
and the relationship we have with the
client is paramount and it's hugely important,
but it is equally important to have a relationship with our customer,
which is the child's parent.
So if you are having issues with getting, buy in, getting patience,
getting understanding,
if your parents are pulling the child before
their natural termination.
So they're only 12 weeks in and the parent
decides they're not going to bring the child anymore
if they continue to complain about all of the problems and the
issues and the behaviors and they don't think play therapy is working
there
presenting to you
their pain points
and part of customer service, whether your insurance, whether you're school,
whether you're private practice, this, this is universal
customer service
is doing everything you can
to prevent pain
to the customer or to fix pain for the customer.
So
maybe one of the reasons
that
you are struggling in your communication with parents
is your mindset needs to shift
to delivering value
to your customer, which is the parent.
If you don't sit down in that parent consultation
and provide them with value
if they don't walk out of there and they don't
feel that they've gained something from that meeting with you,
that was a missed opportunity.
You don't just sit down with a parent in a parent consultation
and say, ok, well, let me tell you what we've been doing together in play therapy.
That's not value for the parent.
That's just trading of information.
You want the parent to walk away
with new tools,
new skills,
new ways of thinking,
a new perspective,
a new approach,
a new level of understanding
you have to give them value.
So part of the parent consultation process
is 100% value driven.
And when a parent feels the value of meeting with you,
they will also feel the value of you working with their child.
It can't be flippant, it can't be haphazard, it can't be
lackadaisical and you're not really that concerned.
It's just I have to check a box that I have to
meet with you so that I can tell you what's happening.
You need to help them feel that as they walk out the door,
they feel better than they did before they came in.
So they have a new outlook, they have a new
impression of what's happening.
And really let's let's get down to the heart of what we're doing here.
We
are always trying to communicate
hope and transformation.
To families
that is the most important thing
that we can do
is help them feel that they can have hope.
And that transformation is the outcome that
we will arrive at in the near future
when we can change our mindset.
And when we can approach everything from a value
laden perspective
and that we instill hope and transformation
in our parents when we have meetings with them,
then all of a sudden
they
start changing their behaviors and attitudes and investment.
If you can clearly communicate
the importance
of what is taking place
as well as
what they can cling to
in the meantime, while we're not quite there yet.
Now, all of a sudden
they are going to be more patient, they will have more understanding,
they will be more bought in and invested.
They won't pull their child early.
They will be understanding of behaviors when they come up. Why?
Because you've taken the time
to not only communicate those things to them,
but you've also given them value along the way
because it's all about the customer service experience
and our parents are our customers.
So if you have been historically treating parents as
means to an end, possibly or an afterthought
or,
a
necessary evil, I say that kind of tongue in cheek. But
I know a lot of therapists that are like, oh my gosh,
if I could just only work with kids and never deal with their parents,
my job would be so much better.
I've heard that a lot actually.
And look, parents aren't always easy to deal with. I get it.
We have some doozies right now. Oh my word, I could tell you stories,
but
I know that dealing with parents, it's not always easy.
But if we don't understand
that they are our customer,
then we've missed the opportunity to deliver
the value, the worth, the hope, the transformation,
all of those things. And I assure you
parents feel the difference
when you approach every interaction, every meeting, every text, every email,
every lobby exchange
with
I'm delivering you value
and I'm clearly communicating to you what's happening
and I'm making sure that you are the most prepared you can be
to take us on this therapeutic journey. When you bring your child to me every week,
it's a totally different engagement.
Then if you're really only focused on your work with the child in the playroom
and they're your client, I get it.
We are client
centered, right? Child-centered, client
centered,
we have to be focused on the child,
but we can't miss the opportunity and the necessity
to focus on the parent as well.
So client is the child, customer is the parent. You have to have that mindset.
That has to be a huge shift
in the way that you think about your work as a child-centered play therapist.
So I hope that that is helpful to you.
And I know I deviated from my, we're moving on to filial plan, but
I had way too many conversations in the last week about this very topic
that I really felt compelled to make sure that that
was clearly communicated as we wrap up the parenting section.
So
please keep that in mind. Your customer experience
is really, really that important and that is all geared toward the parent.
All right, so
please visit playtherapynow.com
if you would like information about everything that we're doing,
you can get on the newsletter, you can sign up for the CCPT Collective,
you can sign up for the filial training that is coming up at the end of March.
If you need CEUs and you need APT credit and you need
knowledge about how to conduct filial therapy specifically with
Landreth and Bratton's child parent relationship training manual.
Then this is going to be an awesome opportunity for you.
So make sure that you sign up seats are limited.
APT restricts how many live attendees can be on any training at any given time. So
make sure you go to playtherapynow.com, you can get caught up on all of that stuff.
You know, how much I love y'all. Thanks for spending time with me each week.
We'll talk again soon. Bye.
Thank you for listening to the Play Therapy Podcast with Dr. Brenna Hicks.
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Please go to www.playtherapypodcast.com